Wrong Numbers

I never noticed just how many wrong number phone calls we received at this house until we started waiting...  waiting for THE MOST IMPORTANT PHONE CALL OF OUR LIVES!!  I am still shaking right now because every single time the phone rings (especially when it is an unknown number), my heart skips a beat and it literally takes my breath away...

I am still trying to catch my breath as I type right now.  Tonight, it is taking a little longer than usual and  though I haven't blogged in a bit, I felt the need to get my thoughts down in writing.  Yes, waiting is tough, but God continues to lead us on the most amazing journey of our lives!  I know that God's timing is PERFECT and that He has a PERFECT plan for our family and maybe these wrong number phone calls are a reminder to keep OUR HOPE in HIM... and that we need to be waiting on HIM and HIS timing and not simply "waiting for a phone call."  HE has called us on this journey and we are excited to follow Him!  We will continue to praise Him in this time of waiting!  

"My Hope is in You" by Aaron Shust has played over and over in my head throughout our adoption journey.  "My HOPE is in YOU, Lord!  A peace that passes understanding is my song.  My HOPE is in YOU, Lord!"  I have had such a peace every step of the way and I know that it can ONLY come from God!  If you know me very well at all, you know that peace in WAITING can ONLY come from the Lord above because this girl alone is NOT good at waiting!  (HAHA!)  So... I will wait on Him for He is my refuge!  I am also so thankful that God has blessed me with Tyler as my husband and partner in this journey because he is SO patient and calm.  He is a gift!

I can't say that I'm not still excited and anxious to receive a phone call saying that we have been matched with our child but I am going to say that I am no longer "waiting on a phone call."  I am waiting on GOD!

Fingerprinting Day!

Tyler and I traveled to Nashville today to be fingerprinted for our I-600a application (Application for Advance Processing of Orphan Petition).  This has been our first BIG step in our adoption journey since our home study was finalized, so we were really excited about doing this today!  It was also nice to just get to spend a nice day together.  The weather was GORGEOUS and our appointment was at 2:00 pm, so we were able to take our time, relax, and really just enjoy our day together.

Now, I suppose we will just wait (We do a LOT of that these days!) and see if the U.S. and the Department of Homeland Security will give us their stamp of approval to proceed with our adoption.  I don't think we have gotten into TOO much trouble (with the exception of toilet papering a few yards ;0) ) - well, hopefully we haven't gotten into any trouble that would keep us from being granted permission from the U.S. government to adopt our baby anyway!  On second thought... maybe we SHOULD start praying that the results of our fingerprinting come back clean of any mischief!  ;0)
(Quick side note: If you are reading this and don't know me - I am SO just kidding!  No criminal activity here!  LOL!)

I was REALLY hoping to take some pictures of us being fingerprinted (You all know how I love taking pictures of every part of this process!), but there was a big sign and an an even BIGGER security guard right as we walked in that said "ABSOLUTELY NO CAMERAS, CELL PHONES, OR ANY OTHER RECORDING DEVICES!!"  It made me so sad!  I was even afraid to snap a picture OUTSIDE!  LOL!  The girls who did our fingerprints were super nice, though, and Tyler even made friends with that big, bad security guard (who turned out not to be so big and bad after all).  :0)  

I was kind of expecting Tyler to have some difficulty getting his prints made since he has a "unique" (I've been sitting here at the computer trying to find the right word to use - LOL!) pinky finger (It was torn off in a yard rolling - aka toilet papering - accident when he was a kid.  No worries, though.  They put it back on.  ;0) That's a whole new story for another day - now that I have you intrigued!), but I'm the one who they had to redo several times.  Apparently, my "ridges aren't deep enough" to get a good enough print.  I had no idea that was even possible.  Oh well!  I guess I'll just have to live with my deformed fingerprint ridges!  LOL!

Anyway, our fingerprints are finished!  We are praying that we only have to do them once (We would LOVE it if you would pray with us about that).  I believe they expire in 18 months.  We've known of a few people who have had to redo this part of the process a few times because of expiration.  As a matter of fact, we saw a lady doing that same thing today.  She was still smiling, though, because she knew that although she was repeating this step (and paying for it again - not cheap); it was bringing her one step closer to her child!  I'm praying that she gets to bring her child home VERY SOON!  :0)

We've Got Mail!

I typically don't love to check the mail.  As a matter of fact, I usually leave this chore for Tyler.  There's just rarely anything fun in there... mostly bills and such... and who wants those???  Not this girl!  LOL!

Lately, that has changed!  I have been checking the mail!  When I was still out of school for the summer, I will even admit that I was basically stalking the mail carrier even!  I have been anxiously awaiting our appointments from the Department of Homeland Security (USCIS - United States Citizenship and Immigration Services) for our fingerprinting!

After my BIG MISTAKE of not sending our home study with our I-600a application, I wasn't sure how long it would be before we got our appointments.  I was actually going to call today to find out if they received our home study and to make sure it got matched with our application.  Thankfully, I check the mail first before I called!!  Much to my surprise...

WE GOT OUR APPOINTMENTS TODAY!!!

PRAISE THE LORD!!!!

GOD IS SO GOOD!!!

Thank you all SO MUCH for all of the prayers!!  This is a pretty big step in the right direction!  

HE'S GOT THIS!

If you read my blog post from yesterday, you could probably sense that I was a little stressed.  Ok, I was a LOT stressed!  I was just so frustrated with myself for missing something that seemed so big that was right in front of my face!  When I pulled the copies of our home study out of the envelope today, there was a BIG, YELLOW post-it note on the TOP copy of the home studies that said, "Send this copy with your I-600a to USCIS."  REALLY?!?!?!  I still cannot believe that I missed this when I am trying SO HARD to be organized (And I have to WORK REALLY HARD AT BEING ORGANIZED!  It does NOT COME NATURALLY!) through all of this!

I went to FedEx this afternoon after school to send our home study to The Department of Homeland Security to be matched with our I-600a application.  As I got in my car, I looked up and noticed this beautiful gift...

It was a much needed reminder from God saying, "Hey Leslie, I've got this!  I promise!"  It was a reminder and a promise that I needed so much today!  

I am typically a REALLY laid back girl, but I have been trying so hard to be a "list person" and to be organized and all these things that I am really not that I'm becoming so uptight... and I don't like it!

So... I'm forgiving myself!  I'm letting go of the control (that I'm really not good at having anyway) and I'm giving it back to God!  HE'S GOT THIS!!!  

OH, HOW THANKFUL I AM!!

HE'S GOT THIS!!!

Making Mistakes...

So, we've been waiting for our fingerprinting appointment from the USCIS (United States Citizenship & Immigration Services) after submitting our I-600a (That's the Application for Advance Processing of Orphan Petition.) form July 11.  We got a receipt from them July 16 that said that they had received our application and payment (which had already gone through the bank and been processed) and it also said that we needed to be looking for our fingerprinting appointment in the next 10-14 days.

We have waited...

And waited...

And those 10-14 days have passed so I called USCIS.  I called yesterday after school and was on hold for over an hour.  I couldn't leave school until 5 and they close at 6, so I hung up at 6:15 when I still hadn't spoken to anyone.

I called again today and spoke to someone.  I didn't hear the news I wanted, but I sure am glad that I called!  The conversation went a little something like this...

USCIS Lady: "Did you include your home study with your application?"

Me: "No.  Was I supposed to include our home study with our application?"

USCIS Lady: "Did an agency help you with this?"

Me:  "Yes, we were given very specific directions - that I read SEVERAL TIMES.  I really don't remember it saying anything about including our home study with the application, but I suppose I could have overlooked it.  I don't think I did because I REALLY read those directions OVER AND OVER AND OVER again so I wouldn't jeopardize anything in this process... but... I'm sure I could have made a big mistake..."

(I was having a TERRIBLE time holding in the tears at this point!  Those of you who know me well, I'm sure can imagine how fast I was talking too at this point!)

USCIS Lady: "You need to go the the USCIS website and download the directions there.  On your receipt, does it say that you missing your home study?"

Me:  "No, it doesn't say it anywhere."

(She was actually very nice and I was managing to remain calm - amazingly - and I was using a nice tone as well.)

USCIS Lady:  "Hmmm... They must have changed the form.  Well, it SHOULD say that.  I suppose it is good that you called.  Otherwise, your application would sit on a shelf for a year and then it would just get thrown away without your home study."

Me:  "I just want to cry right now."

USCIS Lady:  "Oh, there's no reason to cry.  This really isn't that big of a deal."

I just wanted to SCREAM!!  WHAT?!?!?!  NOT A BIG DEAL?!?!?!?  It's JUST MY BABY!!!!!  I managed to keep that on the inside, though, and she told me how to send in our home study and get it matched with our application.

When I got home, I immediately went to find those directions for filling out that form!  Guess what I found...

Does anyone else see it???

YEP!!  Beside the 4., it tells what to send.  It includes payment, documents, and HOME STUDY!!!!  How did I miss that?!?!?!?!  I can not tell you how many times I read this!!!  I have been so careful NOT to miss ANY DETAIL in this process because I have been so scared that I would jeopardize some crucial step in bringing our baby home!  It's no secret that organization and paperwork are not strengths of mine.  That's why I have been SO CAREFUL!  I just don't know how I missed it!

It really ISN'T the end of the world!  I know it isn't!  The nice lady at USCIS (She REALLY was VERY NICE!) told me how to fix this (and it really is very fixable)!  I am just so disappointed in myself for making such a careless mistake.  

I suppose I need to remember...

Oh, how I am TRYING!!  

Good thing I've got God, a ROCK of a husband, and an unbelievable village of family and friends to help me up when I fall!!

Counting Sheep...

I have counted sheep, cows, ducks, pigs... you name it!  I can't sleep!  It's driving me CRAZY!  There's definitely not a lack of desire.  That is certain.  I'm not sure that anyone loves sleep more than I do!  I just can't seem to get any!  This has been an ongoing problem all summer long.  I'll be honest.  I get my days and nights mixed up every summer (I'm pretty sure that I was meant to be nocturnal. HA! HA!), but I'm not sleeping well during the day either.  I have had more headaches this summer than I have had in quite some time and I have developed these beautiful (insert sarcasm) dark bags under my eyes because I just can't seem to get any good sleep.

The reason that I can't sleep is because...

I can't stop thinking about my baby.  That may sound SO CRAZY because we haven't even been matched with our child yet, but it is true.  I am constantly thinking and praying about my baby and his or her birth parents.  I am constantly wondering about him or her.

Is his or her birth mother still pregnant or has my baby already been born?  Could today be the day that my baby is born?  Could TODAY be my kid's birthday?  Are the birth parents scared?  How old are my baby's birth parents?  Is the birth mother all alone?  Does she have any support at all?  Is she a Christian?  What made her choose adoption over abortion in a country where abortion is so common?  OH, HOW THANKFUL I AM THAT SHE DID!!!

These questions and SO MANY MORE play over and over and over in my head every single night (and day).  I can only speak for myself, but I would imagine that most adoptive moms have similar questions that they think about often as well.  Although it may seem that way, these questions are not a product of worry.  They are simply a product of wonder and longing to know as much as I can about my child.  God has provided me with such a comfort and peace about this whole process.  I am praying that doesn't change!

I am going to TRY MY VERY BEST to get some sleep now!  Maybe I will try something new and count Zebras tonight/this morning! ;0)  I better figure something out pretty fast since school starts this week!!

It's a Small World...

Today has been a FABULOUS day!!  I got to meet someone today (in person) who has become an incredible friend and TREMENDOUS support to me in our adoption journey!  

This picture could be used on a billboard for "It's a Small World!"  You see, Tara and I "met" because she and her husband adopted their beautiful baby girl, Rossi Quinn, from the same orphanage in Taiwan where we are in the process of adopting our baby.  You might not think that's such a big deal, but they live in Muhlenburg County, KY (which is only a little over an hour away from Warren County, where we live).  What really makes it a small world, though, is that my really good friend and neighbor who lives RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET from me is one of Tara's best friends!  Tara and I became friends because of our connection on the other side of the world, but we also had a connection so close to home as well!  It really is such a small world!  

I was SO EXCITED about meeting Tara and Rossi Quinn!  I had a hard time going to sleep last night! I couldn't decide what to wear and to be completely honest, I cried a couple of times before going over to Millie's house.  I think I was so emotional because this was the first time I have met (in person) anyone from The Home of God's Love (That's the name of the orphanage in Taiwan.) and it just made me feel that much more connected to this amazing place where we hope to be eventually going to adopt our own precious child.  Meeting Rossi for the first time and actually seeing her in person made it that much more of a reality!  If I was this excited, emotional, nervous, etc. over seeing them, I can only imagine how I will be when we travel to Taiwan!  I should probably start stocking up on tissues now!  Maybe I should buy an extra suitcase just for my tissues!  LOL!  I've been telling you all that these adoption hormones are out of control! ;0)

As Tara said today, I also cannot wait for our babies to play together!  I can't wait to see a third little one on this little couch!  They were too cute today!  I just love both of these precious girls so much!!

I am so thankful for Millie and Olivia and so thankful that Millie arranged for Tara, Rossi, and I to meet today!  It really was the BEST DAY!!  :0)